


and these blood stained hands

by call_me_steve



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Bruce Wayne is a Bad Parent, Child Abuse, Gen, Graphically, Harm to Children, Hurt Damian Wayne, Hurt/Comfort, Including: Bruce's No Kill Rule, Missions Gone Wrong, Murder, Not Beta Read, Protective Siblings, Violence, but bruce gets pissed off, damn spelling, he has a good reason too, hurt kinda comfort, like ig dami ends up killing smone somewhat graphicly, literally wrote this when it hit me randomly, oopsy went wild with the tags, we die like men COWARDS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-10
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2021-01-26 17:10:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21377611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/call_me_steve/pseuds/call_me_steve
Summary: A mission goes wrong, and Damian's forced between a rock and a hard place.He can either kill this villain, or be killed instead.(He did what he had to do.)Bruce doesn't agree with his decision.
Relationships: Tim Drake & Dick Grayson & Jason Todd & Damian Wayne
Comments: 18
Kudos: 791





	and these blood stained hands

**Author's Note:**

> yeah i have no idea where the hell this came from but :)) i'm on a damian kick, idk if you could tell from my massive mass of damian fics as of late
> 
> tumblr: [potato-reblob](https://potato-reblob.tumblr.com/)

Grayson hums over the comms, before singing out, “_But _ Dami_, we love you!_” 

Damian can’t help the face that he makes. He’s hidden up in the rafters, so it’s not like anyone can see him. Other than the goons here, the only person of importance is Father. All of his brothers are at the warehouse next door, taking that one down from the inside as Batman and Robin do their best to do the same with the bigger one. Father isn’t one to mock Damian for the little faces he makes. Hell, Father doesn’t even really care about Damian’s face, probably.

(_Very eloquent, Damian, _he berates.) 

In a hushed tone, Damian replies with a curt, “Shut up. No names in the field” He shifts to make his position a bit more comfortable, trying to focus on what- as Todd would call him- Big and Ugly is saying. Big and Ugly, presumably, is the lead goon of the warehouse they’re in. He’s got a big round belly and broad shoulders, hence the big, and a ratty face and crooked nose. It’s like he’d been punched in the face, once upon a time, and his nose never healed right. “I am trying to _ listen_-” 

“_See?_” Grayson half-whines. “_You just don’t love us. It’s unfair, Dami!_” 

Damian rolls his eyes and reminds Grayson about names again. Big and Ugly finally moves on to what Damian’s listening in for: the location of where they’re sending the shipment of stolen technology. He fiddles to pull a little recording device from his belt, and when he pulls it out, he grips it between his fingers and reaches down so it’ll catch what they’re saying. His memory will suffice perfectly, but it’s always good to have a second resource. 

Big and Ugly says that it’s going out of the city for a few days. “We’ll store it away in a warehouse until we’ve decided on who were selling it too,” he says in a low, gravely voice. It sounds like a smokers voice. Thing is, Damian hasn’t seen hint nor hide of any ash trays or cigarette packs. “Chances are, that chick down in the Middle East will end up takin’ it. She’s offered to pay extra to cover the costs for sendin’ it down, and she’s also offered the most amount of cash for it.” 

“Was she in the Middle East? I thought it was somewhere else,” one of the other goons says. This one is tall and lean- Big and Ugly’s total opposite in everything but looks. They’re both ugly. Very ugly. “Like, Indian or Arabic. Pakistan?” 

There’s another eye roll from Damian. These people clearly don’t know what they’re talking about. No matter how much these guys make him want to roll his eyes back so far they roll into his head. Maybe if he fell he could crack his head open, slam his brain into the ground, and go deaf. Going deaf would be preferable to going blind, after all. That, and not being able to hear includes not being able to hear bullshit. Aw _ man, _ if Damian had one superpower, that’s what he’d want it to be. _ Not _ having to deal with _ bullshit. _

His whole family would go out of business. It’d be amazing. 

The conversation cuts off and Damian pulls himself back up. The blood that had built up in his face to make his face red fades back, returning to its tan color. “Alright Batman, I am pulling out.” 

“_Stay where you are,_” Batman replies. “_There’s more men than I expected- the building isn’t empty yet._” 

“I cannot stay up here any longer,” Damian says, curtly. He really can’t. He’s been up here for a few hours now- you’d be utterly _ surprised _ how long some people can talk without a point. His legs are starting to ache from hanging upside down for a while, and the little place he’s holed up in is tiny. Mother would be disappointed in how weak he’s gotten. Back when he was seven, he could’ve stayed here for over a week, if need be. Grayson, he decides, has made him soft. Weak. He doesn’t totally hate it. “If I do, I might end up ruining the mission. These men do not seem to be in a hurry to leave any time soon, and we already have what we came for.”

“_Stay there. The perimeter isn’t clear and Nightwing and his team aren’t done with their half of the mission. Until I give you the all clear, you’ll stay,” _ Batman says back. “_Understood?_” 

“_Batman- Robin, at least get to someplace that you can hold out,_” Grayson interjects. 

“_You will _ stay _ until I tell you to _ move _ Robin._” 

Damian can’t possibly say no to Father, because all he’s ever wanted was to win Father over. So his sits still and tries to ignore how his legs ache further. The men below him continue to drone on and he tries to listen intently for absolutely anything else about the shipment. Instead, they talk about _ women_\- something that Damian really doesn’t need to hear- and pull up a few chairs to play a game of cards. Directly underneath Damian. He tries his hardest not to swear. 

After a bit, Grayson returns to talking on the comms. It’s kind of comforting. Damian humors him slightly more, but mostly just tries to ignore him and stew in his frustration. He tries his best to lay down in the space that he’s been given, but the rafter he’s on is too thin for him to remain comfortable. “_How are you holding up, Robin?_” Grayson asks, once. He sounds like he’s been running, and if the previous grunt says anything, he must’ve just taken someone down. “_Red Robin, Hood- Are you seeing this?!"_

“_Is he actually serious?_” Drake half-sighs. “_We’re dealing with colossal _ idiots! _ Seriously, Batman, I was right!_” 

“_What’s going on?_” Father breaks in. “_Report._” 

“_One of the lead crooks has an honest to go- FU- FALL BACK! BOTH OF YO-_” 

Damian doesn’t have enough time to steal himself before an explosion rocks the entire building. It forces him from his spot up in the rafters, shaking him off and sending him crashing down into the floor. He winds up going straight through the table that the goons were using as a card table, splitting the wood into two. He lets out a cry as it jolts his back. 

He doesn’t have enough time before Big and Ugly tears him up from the ground and straight into the air. He can’t force enough air out of his throat to make any other sound than a low wheeze. In his ear, Batman barks out for everyone to report. Damian doesn’t think that anyone replies to him. Big and Ugly dangles Damian by his ankle and raises him up to stare at him straight in the eyes. 

“Look at what we’ve caught,” Tall and Lean- Damian is _ so _ good with this naming thing- croons. He reaches up and pokes Damian’s cheek. He tries his best to bite at Tall and Lean’s finger, but the bastard pulls away scott free. “A little _ bird._” 

“That explosion was probably the Bat,” Big and Ugly snarks. “Aton, Mark, go give the boys some extra help. _ I’m _ going to kill his little _ partner._” 

Damian tries to kick at Big and Ugly, but he doesn’t have enough momentum to back him up. “Like hell you _ will,_” he says out of pure reflex. 

In turn, Big and Ugly slams him straight into the ground before fixing his grip so he’s holding Damian’s head instead of his ankle. “I will crush your skull with my bare hands if you so much as _ think _ about doing that again. Dan, hand me my gun.” Tall and Lean pulls away- that must be Dan, Damian thinks, as Big and Ugly digs his head straight into the ground. Big and Ugly leans down closer to his ear. “Now, as much as I’d love to draw this out-” His free hand crawls down to Damian’s wrist, and his foot finds it’s way onto Damian’s ankle. “-I can’t. The Bat’ll come running and so will all of his little friends. So.” 

His heel slams down into Damian’s ankle at the same time he snaps his wrist. Naturally, Damian _ screams _ and tries to buck up, attempting to get Big and Ugly off of his back. Out of the corner of his eyes, he can see the glint of a knife on Big and Ugly’s hip. (Every training session he’s ever had while at the League tells him to get his hands on that knife, because he knows that this man isn’t _ bluffing _ and will actually _ kill Damian _ if he’s not careful enough.) 

Immediately, he checks off his wrist. His ankle might just work, but Damian has a good feeling that Big and Ugly will _ actually _ break his leg just to keep him from running. His comm is still working, though it crackles here and there when (presumably) Grayson relays their situation and status. 

Dan- Tall and Lean- places the gun in Big and Ugly’s waiting palm. In the span of Big and Ugly taking the gun, his attention is off of Damian. Damian takes this as his chance to strike, slamming up his knee into Big and Ugly’s crotch and flailing his good hand out to grab the knife. His fingers curl around the handle as his head goes straight into the ground. This forces his arm to yank back, but he takes the knife with him. Big and Ugly leans down again, over the top of Damian with a low groan. 

“Mother_ fucker-_” His hand digs Damian’s skull into the ground, and it’s all Damian can do to bite back his little scream. The next moment, the cold bite of metal slams into his forehead as Big and Ugly begins to yell. “What the hell did I _ say, _ you little bastard?!” He lifts Damian’s head an inch, before forcing it back down. 

At least, Damian thinks, he’s buying himself time. Hopefully the others caught up on Damian’s _ screams. _ Otherwise, he doesn’t need to bother buying time. He might as well just die. 

The safety of the gun clicks off. 

Big and Ugly is Big and _ Serious_. Something sinks down to the very pit of Damian’s gut because he’s already died once and you know what? Damian _ really doesn’t want to die again. _ He pulls on his best ‘_I’m literally five and about to piss my pants in fear_’ face, before forcing (he doesn’t have to force anything, his heart beats faster because Damian Wayne is actually _ scared _) a tear to slip under his mask and down the side of his cheek. 

“_Please,_” he tries, and he knows that simply _ hurting _ this man isn’t going to save his life, “I do not want to die.” 

There’s a lot of things that Damian has yet to tell his family. There’s a lot of things he wishes he didn’t _ have _ to say, too. _ I don’t want to die _ is one of those things that he really wishes Grayson didn’t have to hear him say- especially not when Grayson’s panicked voice breaks through with a, "_Baby Bat? What’s wrong?! Robin-? _Batman!” 

“I do not want to die,” he says, “_please, _ I do _ not wanna die- Please-_” 

His hand tightens around the knife as Big and Ugly’s finger starts to do the same with the trigger. He’s dead, he’s _ dead, Damian Wayne is dead- _

“_I love you,_” Damian sobs into the comm. “I’m sorry I never said it- I’m sorry I got myself into this- I’m _ sorry, _ I love you guys-” 

Big and Ugly sneers. “Bye bye, Birdie-” 

It’s all al Ghul that drives Damian to strike with the knife. 

It cleaves straight through the goon’s throat as Damian chokes back another sob. Big and Ugly’s head rolls straight off of his body as it slumps forwards, right beside Damian. Blood spurts everywhere, like when you step on a ketchup packet and it literally explodes. The gun clatters to the ground. Damian rolls out from under Big and Ugly quickly, already forcing his emotions down six feet under. He grabs the gun and trains it on Dan, whose shoulders are already shaking. He’s killed before and he tries his best to force an air around him that speaks of just that. This doesn’t affect him. Almost dying doesn’t affect him. 

“_Leave,_” Damian says, trying to sound as threatening as he can. “Put down any weapons you have and get the fuck out of here.” 

Dan scurries to do what he says. “What the _ hell- _ You’re a fucking _ demon,_” he forces out, just before high tailing it out of the room. Damian scoffs. Says one of the men who was just about to kill an _ eleven _year old. He takes stock of the room once he’s alone, making sure to remind whoever comes in for him grabs the laptops on the larger table that’s shoved up against the wall. 

After a beat, Grayson breathes out, “_Robin, report._” 

“Sprained ankle. Broken wrist. Possible concussion,” he says into the comms. He switches to private, before speaking again. “I think I” -there’s no _ thinking, _ Damian knows- “killed someo-” 

He hears Father before he sees him. He can already see the cloudy anger that paints his father’s face- already feel it rolling off of him in waves. Father stops at the doorway and drinks in the gun in Damian’s hands, the bloody knife by his thigh, the decapitated person to his right. Damian twists and sees Father’s hands clench at his sides. He must’ve ran into Dan. He must’ve heard Damian over the comms, he must’ve- 

Father’s fist meets the side of Damian’s head. He has a strict no kill rule, and Damian had promised forever ago that as long as he was a Wayne- a Robin and a Bat- he wouldn’t kill another soul. He was meant to be a Wayne for the rest of his _ life- _and here he was. Breaking Father’s biggest rule. 

He had every right to be pissed. 

Father pulls Damian up by his hood and the fabric tenses against Damian’s throat. Damian pulls at it with his good hand, kicking with his good foot as the ground disappears from under him. “I _ told you,_” Father yells, and his voice shakes and so does Damian. “_One _ rule, Robin! You don’t follow any other rule, and for once you followed at least _ one! _ And now you go through that out the window- _ We don’t kill, _ Robin!” 

Robin, not Damian. 

In his ear, Grayson keeps up a steady barrage of questions, switching over to _ Dami _ seamlessly. "_Dami, what do you mean you think you killed someone? Are you okay? Dami, what happened? Answer me, Damian Wayne- I’ll be right there- Red! Both of you, with me! We’re pulling out!_” 

“_One rule!_” Father continues, shaking him. “I’ve told you that to be apart of this family you _ can’t kill! _ My _ one rule _ about all of this- And yet you-” 

“_Put him down!_” Grayson shrieks, twisting around the corner. Father doesn’t even loosen his grip, so Grayson moves over and pulls Damian up onto his hip, relieving the pressure on his body. He unclips his cape, leaving Father to hold it, and then steps away. He hardly seems bothered by the body beside him. As both Drake and Todd turn the corner next, it’s only Drake who pauses to look at Big and Ugly’s form. “What’d he do, Baby Bat?” 

Damian gestures to Big and Ugly, then to the discarded gun. “He tried to kill me. He- He would have _ killed _ me- But-” 

“You did what you had to do,” Grayson says, putting together the pieces before Damian can finish. “You did good, Baby Bat. What do you say we go home and patch you up, hm? You can get a nice, hot bath, and I’ll make us hot chocolate-” 

“And we’ll watch that Disney shit till you’ve got _ Let it Go _ stuck in your head,” Todd pipes up, scooping up one of the laptops. Damian relaxes into Grayson. “You’re gonna have a nasty shiner right there” -he points at his cheek, where Father had hit him. Damian wonders how he had known- “kiddo. That, and you’ll be in a neon pink cast for a few weeks. Possibly on crutches too. _ That _ means Disney movies until you know _ Brave _ by heart.” 

Damian peers over at Father, as Drake finds a spot at Grayson’s side. He pokes at Damian’s leg, before switching his focus to Damian’s head, where his hair is matted with blood. Head wounds tend to bleed a lot, so Damian’s not really worried. He still pouts about the contact. “Can we watch _ Aladdin?_” he asks. 

Just as Grayson says, _ Of course, _ Todd shakes his head. “So you can complain about how Jasmine totally could have won the whole movie without needing Aladdin there?” 

“It’s because she _ could _have, Todd."

“Jasmine is a _ strong, _ independent woman who don’t need no man,” Grayson grins. “I’ll call ahead and let Alfred know that we should get patched up fast. Can you give me the recording you got?” Damian hands it over without a word, and then Grayson shifts him out of his hold and into Drake’s. Drake wobbles slightly to adjust to the added weight and Damian pouts further. “You two can go out to the car. I’ll be right there.” 

Damian can tell that he’s lying- he’ll be in here with Jason for a little longer than what counts as _ right there. _He droops as Drake begins to walk. “My tablet’s in the batmobile,” Drake says. “Any specific movie you want to watch right now?”

“_Coraline._” 

“Not _ Aladdin_?” 

“It gets on Todd’s nerves when I complain about _ Aladdin. _ It is funny to hear.” Damian hums. “Although, _ Coraline _ freaks Grayson out.” 

“_Coraline _ freaks _ me _ out,” Drake mutters. 

When they get to the car, Drake pulls it up anyway. He fishes out pain medication and forces Damian to take it. (They both pretend like Damian stays awake through the movie, and pretend like Damian doesn’t end up slouching against Drake. He has a reputation, after all, _ Grayson._) 

Father doesn’t end up coming home. 


End file.
